Over three-quarters of divorced and widowed Baby Boomers will marry again, state the latest available statistics from the U.S. Census Bureau. In addition, over half (52 to 62 percent) of marriages will end in divorce. Not surprisingly, that leads to 43 percent of marriages actually being remarriages for at least one of the members of the couple. As a result, nearly two-thirds (65 percent) of remarriages involve children from prior marriages, creating a blended family.

 

With so many Boomers remarrying, demo dirt spoke with Gary Altman, Esq., about the implications of these new unions. Altman is president and founder of the Maryland-based estate planning law firm, Altman & Associates, and Chairman of the National Capital Area Financial Planning Association. 

 

"As a Boomer and a romantic, I believe that marriage (even the second time around) is a wonderful thing. That said, the attorney and the realist in me knows that sometimes financial and estate issues can get in the way. Therefore, there are several things to consider when remarrying." These issues include providing for children and the new spouse, division of property, pensions and Social Security, and prenuptial agreements, among other provisions (see Altman’s Top Points to Consider When Remarrying, as emailed to demo dirt, following this article).

 

Altman says he has noticed a trend of love happy Boomers both in his personal and professional circles. “Very few of my clients who have lost a spouse to death have not remarried. A lot of people are getting remarried after a spouse dies or after a divorce. Last year my oldest friend in the world got married for the second time. Another good friend will get remarried soon,” Altman tells demo dirt.

 

Has Altman noticed differences between the dating and marrying habits of male and female Boomers? “I think men who are widowed maybe get remarried quicker than men who are divorced,” Altman says. “There are probably some psychological reasons for it on both the side of the male and the female. I think women have a harder time remarrying, in either case.”

 

Single gals, it’s not just you. “The old adage that there are a lot more women that are available for marriage than men is true,” Altman adds.

 

But hope is not lost for Boomer ladies looking for love. Altman says that the stereotype of the older man with the younger so-called trophy wife usually does not apply, at least when walking down the aisle. Citing his own marriage to a fellow Boomer, as well as his friends who have remarried women their own, or close to their own ages, he says, “There are many men who will marry in their age bracket rather than someone in their twenties. You want to be able to talk to someone, to discuss experiences and a shared history. Twenty-somethings are great, but they don’t have the same knowledge that fifty-year-olds do.” And that, Altman adds, is what counts when it comes to marriage.  

 

No matter what the age of the bride and groom, the biggest mistake most couples make is lack of legal planning. “Before they get married they don’t figure out the economics of the relationship. They don’t plan for what is the inevitable, whether it be a death or a subsequent divorce. They don’t plan for what to do if something happens,” Altman explains.

 

And the danger of not planning for the worst is constantly evident. “In the past week, I have had two people come to me who have said they remarried and now they want to protect their assets,” Altman says. “You can’t do it. You can do it before very easily, but after the fact it is very difficult.”

That’s because, Altman explains, the couple is legally bound to one another. “Everyone in their heart is a romantic, they want things to work out, but until you are married do not put your spouse’s name on anything, unless it is truly an economic partnership,” Altman advises.

 

Sometimes divorce can be messy, from, among other things, a legal perspective, Altman says. “Death is actually easier to deal with than divorce in terms of estate planning,” he adds.

 

  

Altman’s Top Points to Consider When Remarrying:

 

1.)  Children from a first marriage

·         How to care for them financially while providing for new spouse.

·         How to leave assets fairly between children from first marriage and new spouse.

2.)  Pre-marital agreements

·         Consider signing to protect income, as well as children's inheritance rights.

3.)  Living arrangements

·         If life in one spouse's house, how to insure that surviving spouse is not kicked out by deceased spouse's family.

4.)  Medicaid

·         If one spouse goes into nursing home, then both spouses' assets must be used.

5.)  Estate Taxes

·         It can be easy to defer estate taxes when married in which cases the unlimited marital deduction may be used.

6.)  Pensions/Social Security

·         If one or both spouses are getting a pension, then new spouse may be entitled to survivor pension, same with social security.

7.)  ERISA Plans / IRA

·         May need/want waiver of Employee Retirement Income Security Act (ERISA) plans which has to be done after marriage. The same goes for IRAs in some states.